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DNC releases a "holiday" gift to sex-harrassers.

Sexual Harassment Form 040447339/TIT/30278837/Grope

Name: _______________________________ SOCIAL SECURITY No:___________

ADDRESS: ____________________________

CITY: _________________________________

STAFF ELEMENT: ______________________

HOME PHONE No.: _______________________

MALE: ____________ FEMALE: __________

Office Contact No.: _____________________

Sexual Preferences:

Male - Female ....

Female - Female ....

Male - Male ....

All of the Above ....

None of the Above - Please Specify: _____________________

I Consent to the following forms of Sexual Harassment:

Salutatory Greeting: _____________________

Eye-to-Eye Contact: ______________________

Eye-to-Bust Contact: _____________________

Eye-to-Below Waist Contact: ______________

Heavy breathing on:

Neck: _________________

Ear: __________________

Fridays: ________________

Other: ________________

Hands on:
Body: ___________________________

Shoulder: _______________________

Waist: __________________________

Gluteus Maximus: ________________

Other: __________________________

Feelies: _________________________________

Gropies: _________________________________

Penetration (however slight): ____________

Other: ___________________________________

All of the above: ________________________

Misellaneous: I WILL I WILL NOT

1. Assist in procurement of various potions, lotions, products, appliances, etc. to be used during sexual harassment.

2. Assist in procurement and maintenance of various types of sustaining apparatus.

3. Clean up.

I Certify that I will accept Sexual Harassment from:

Anyone: ____________________________________

Anyone But: ________________________________

Only: ______________________________________

By applying your signature to this consent form, you will be committing yourself unconditionally to the acceptance of varying degrees of intrusionalistic activities and interest of office perverts, Spoof writers, weirdos, William Hague (if male), Liberal Democrats, and Big Issue sellers.

Clause 8837//449035:
In the event of the Sexual Harassment being performed or attempted to be performed by any Sexual Harasser who has received any cautions, warnings, prison sentences, criminal charges, suspended sentences, probation, or drinks cheap imported Vodka, and have harassed within the guidelines, rules, and the validity of all clauses within the scope of the neutralisation of the said agreement, will enable the legalisation of any claims you wish to make through the Unemployed Nottingham Consultancy Solicitors, on 0115 962664848

SIGNATURE: _______________________________________ DATE: ___________

This form is to be reviewed by immediate supervisor annually, prior to
performance rating and evaluation.


  • There's also a pre-designed apology Letter to leave under their Victims:

    "There are no words that can take back the way that I made you feel. While I want to tell you that I only meant to be funny and engaging, I understand that I crossed a line and made you feel uncomfortable, out-of-place and discriminated against.

    Everyone should feel safe and at ease in their work environment and I am so very sorry that I made you feel otherwise. I will work hard to modify my behavior and maintain a professional atmosphere in the workplace."

    And a few Training Films:

    (In case the last one isn't available, it's Tom Brady sexy double standard on SNL)
  • This crap is getting out of hand. Depending on the standards applied, which of us can honestly say there is ZERO possibility of being accused of sexual harassment/assault? Given the standards change minute to minute and can include consensual and legal activity, anyone can be burned at the stake or drowned in this witch hunt.
  • But, but, but..... I thought we ALL had a safe space when others didn't like what we think or do? Have I been misled? So, when I compliment some woman's body I'm a sexual predator? Yet, if I don't, she thinks I think she's unattractive and beneath me because she's a woman? Those rules had to be made by a chick, I need my safe space!
  • You are both completely correct.

    It's a sad Social Commentary that for over 2 decades I've had to preface my Compliments with: "Do you mind if I Compliment your (___)?" (Appearance, Clothing, Speech, Inteligence, etc.)
  • just to be honest, I have very little sympathy for a lot of these spoiled brat starlets claiming harassment........they want people like me unemplyed, defenseless and stuck out, but not them
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